Feb 21, 2010
I need a tune up
I am here to post the honest truth-I am in a slump. I am not feeling even the slightest creative spark currently and I am not sure how to get out of it. I have an idea list of things that I want to do but just can't seem to find the creative juices to get started. I need to refresh my battery, tweek my engine or something. I just got home from a "vacation" to another small town in my great state for the state basketball tournament. We were staying at a hotel with a swimming pool, there was a new walmart for me to frequent (and get material for a good post of two), the town had a clothing store at which I planned to go shopping-so it had the makings for a rejuvenating experience. Or so I thought. It was possibly one of the most stressful things I have done in a while. I don't think there was one moment of relaxation that took place for me and I didn't come home with that recharged, revamped feeling that even a mini vacation is supposed to produce. And you know I have been thinking-we take our cars in to get them a tune up to keep them running properly and at their best and yet how many mothers ever get a tune up. I am not tuned up. I was watching "What Not to Wear" which I try not to make habit of because it makes me feel worse about my very poor selection of clothing each time I watch the show, but there was nothing else on and I was rocking the baby to sleep. Anyway they were making over a women who was 38 years old. She said she didn't think it mattered how you dressed after you got married and had kids. They told her she looked like she threw in the towel at age 35. She said, she felt like she threw in the towel at age 30. That is me people. 30. This mother said she just didn't feel like she should spend money and time on herself but that she needed to devote it to her family. And I like what Stacey and Clinton told her "you are part of the picture too-why is it that you don't feel like you deserve some time and money as well." Exactly- but I fall into that same mothers trap-worry about everyone else, who has time for hair and makeup the baby is crying, shop for myself-how with two children under the age of 2. I feel guilty spending money on myself especially since I am not the one who makes the money and so I feel like it shouldn't be spent on a new shirt for me-I should buy new crayons for small fry and diapers and fruit and fresh veggies and toilet bowel cleaner. And all the while as a mom you just get more and more run down and run down. AND THEN YOU NEED A TUNE UP!!!! That is where I am at. I am feeling a major need for a tune up, something fresh and fun, and a creative spark. Quite possibly I am the only one out there like this but basically what I am saying is-this gal is just fresh tapped out. So I might just be posting some new recipes for a couple of days while I see if I can get myself back together. Stay tuned.